Magic Monkey Juice (with baked kumara) VeganBakedNaturalGluten Free

Last updated May 5, 2020 Copy
AmountIngredient$ / daySource
0gMasa - Yellow (Nixta Masa)$0.00Davis
30gLinseed (Brown, Ground)$0.18Davis
1pillCholine - Tablet$0.30Here
0pillMultivitamin (Nature's Way Alive Men's)$0.00Here
30gPea Protein Isolate (Naked)$0.78Here
27gCoconut Oil$0.27Grocer
1.8gSea Salt (Mildly Iodized)$0.01Here (Pick-up)
0mlSunflower Oil$0.00Grocer
1pillCalcium - Tablet$0.11Swisse Calcium + Vitamin D
0gPepper (Black)$0.00Grocer
0gKumara (optional), cooked, baked in skin$0.00
550gPotatoes, baked, flesh and skin$0.00
0pillMultivitamin (blackmores)$0.00Here
0pillMultivitamin (caruso$0.00Here
1pillmultivitamin (Sanderson- once a day mega multi)$0.26
24gOil, olive, salad or cooking$0.00
30gHummus INCOMPLETE - {checking micronutes})$0.00
6gKale Powder$0.00
30gSeeds, sunflower seed kernels, dried$0.00
0gPotatoes, boiled, cooked in skin, flesh, with salt$0.00
300gmasa (white)$0.00
550gSweet potato, cooked, boiled, without skin$0.00
5g$0.00
Amounts for:
Total Daily Cost:
$1.91Add Ingredients
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This is an ongoing project. Proceed with caution. Still unfinished. Research omega ratios etc.

A "magic monkey juice" (Younger Brother reference) recipe with hybrid potato excitement.

Add your own flavoring or the drinks will be somewhat bland, albeit with the rustic sparkle of taco tangles. The masa is grainy and sedimentation is vehemently omnipresent unless blending is an option.

The potatoes are to be baked separately. These can be coated in a goop made of corn starch and oil, and thinly cut for crispy flupperance.

Shrewd cost-cutting motivates this recipe. Very good results with this so far. Mental and physical vigor notably enhanced. Vegan, Gluten-free, Low-FODMAP, sugar-free-ish.


Baked:

Potatoes

^ Coconut Oil

^ Sunflower Oil

^ Sea Salt (option 1) (seasoning)

^ Basil (seasoning)

^ Pepper


Blended:

Masa (Coarse texture)

Linseed (Grind in daily or weekly portions and preferably freeze the ground linseed)

Pea protein Isolate

^Sea Salt (option 2)


Taken separately:

Choline tablet

Multivitamin tablet

Calcium (Half a tablet)


Notes:

Prices in NZD.

Total reliance on this recipe is an act of pure rebellion against the bourgeois state and a defiant symbol of radical anarchy. If you aren't feeling rebellious, you are hereby permitted to consume a piece of fruit or a single (one) pringle each day.

Spiritual vibes and undiscovered quantum nano-nutrients haven't been factored in to this recipe. Various fun additions omitted - raw stevia leaf flavoring is a nice addition.

Tablets have been added to keep the cost down. They're to be taken separately. Don't blend the tablets.

A lot of the ingredients for this can be grown at home. It is time to stop consuming all this trash being manufactured from the bones of a dying world. The pringle, however, is a notable exception.

Quantities are easily divisible by 3, to easily calculate thrice-daily grazing habits. Remember that the numbers are for one whole day, not one meal (if the saltiness is extremely vicious, you've just blown it).

Make sure to drink the appropriate amount of water per day. Remember that some food-based water sources commonly found in the diets of muggles aren't present with this recipe. This may need to be factored into the recommended water intake figures peddled by the internet, although most of these are bullshit anyway.

Nutrition Facts

Amount Per Day
59% Carb, 12% Protein, 29% Fat
Calories1292
% Daily Values*
Total Carbohydrate359g
141%
Dietary Fiber 42g
115%
Protein73g
Total Fat78g
Saturated Fat30g
Monounsaturated Fat30g
Polyunsaturated Fat25g
612%
Omega-3 Fatty Acids8g
92%
Omega-6 Fatty Acids12g
Cholesterol0mg
Calcium
> 14856%
Vitamin A
169%
Chloride
Vitamin B6
2481%
Chromium
334%
Vitamin B12
1042%
Copper
150%
Vitamin C
452%
Iodine
106%
Vitamin D
267%
Iron
462%
Vitamin E
1763%
Magnesium
99%
Vitamin K
221%
Manganese
137%
Thiamin
2191%
Molybdenum
99%
Riboflavin
1955%
Phosphorus
80%
Niacin
292%
Potassium
90%
Folate
112%
Selenium
115%
Pantothenic Acid
495%
Sodium
122%
Biotin
149%
Sulfur
Choline
103%
Zinc
173%
 
* Percent Daily Values are based on "Australian Government RDIs (Male 19-30)". You may use the Nutrient Calculator to personalise your own profile, then select it from the list on the Recipe Editor tab.
Nutrient Profile: Australian Government RDIs (Male 19-30)Change

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